


Pig Nose

by Cameo_Cat



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: A dumb idea that got out of hand, Adrien literally has a pig face, Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - No Powers, F/M, Fluff, Humor, Penelope AU, Pig Nose AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-09
Updated: 2020-02-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:47:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22640503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cameo_Cat/pseuds/Cameo_Cat
Summary: Also known as the Penelope AU. Also a thinly disguised Beauty and the Beast AU. Also known as My-Ancestors-Fucked-Up-So-I’m-Paying-For-It AUJust a blatant rip off of the 2000′s film Penelope with a few creative liberties.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 2
Kudos: 38





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I could fix the formatting so that it looks more like a normal story but I honestly find it funnier this way. Let's have some fun!
> 
> Original posts on tumblr:  
> Parts 1-7: https://dakota-r-riley.tumblr.com/post/190297534441/pig-nose-au  
> Parts 8-11: https://dakota-r-riley.tumblr.com/post/190657672346/pig-nose-au

Years ago great-great-great-great grandaddy Graham de Vanily fell in love and got a servant in their household pregnant.

The family was like **‘ew, you can’t marry a poor girl. marry this rich noble lady instead.’**

**‘but i love my poor servant baby mama!’**

**‘too fucking bad. you want your inheritance then you gonna do as we say!’**

So he marries the noble lady and servant that got spurned is sent away from the house never to be seen again. Our poor pregnant lady is obviously pissed about all of this so decides to curse the Graham de Vanily line. Since appearances meant so much to this family then the next son of Graham de Vanily blood will be born with the face of a pig and that the curse may only be broken when the child can be **‘accepted by one of their own kind’.**

The family of course shrugs her off but lives in fear for the next couple generations that they will end up giving birth to a pig faced boy.

Despite all probability no one does. They have all girls.

Finally we get to modern day and the latest daughter of the Graham de Vanily house, Emilie, marries a man named Gabriel Agreste. Shortly there after they get pregnant and end up having the first boy in generations.

**‘he’s healthy happy…oh dear.’** Gabriel gazed at the crying baby in the doctor’s arms.

**‘what?’** Emilie visibly exhausted and emotional

**‘you know how you said that your family had a superstition about having sons?’**

**‘yeah?’**

**‘it’s not just a superstition. he’s got pig ears and a snout and a tail–oh wait no, that’s just his wee-wee. we’re fine. just a nose and ears.’**

**‘our son has a pig face! this is not fine!’**

they ask the doctor if anything can be done but it turns out there is an artery flowing through the snout that makes removal impossible.

**‘so…this is not ideal.’**

**‘no fucking shit Gabe!’** Emilie is bawling **‘what are we gonna do? i don’t want people gawking at our son like he’s some kind of freak. it’s not his fault my great-great-whatever grandpa pissed off a pregnant witch.’**

**‘i have an idea’**

**‘please tell me it isn’t overly dramatic’**

**‘we fake his death and raise him in secret until he’s old enough for the curse to be broken.’**

**‘…’**

**‘so is that a yes?’**

**‘WE ARE NOT DOING THAT!’**

They took little pig boy Adrien Agreste home and kept him hidden as best they could from the press. It wasn’t until a very nosy reporter went so far as to break into the house to try and get a picture of the baby did the parents decide to take drastic action.

**‘i think it is time we got a bodyguard for Adrien.’**

**‘i agree.’** Emilie sighed, **‘but that won’t be enough. no matter what people aren’t going to stop clamoring for Adrien.’**

**‘are you saying–’**

**‘we can fake his death. there’s a secluded mansion far from here that we can raise him in with no one being the wiser.’**

**‘YES!’**

**‘you are way too excited about faking your sons death.’**

**‘the drama tho! there is not gonna be a dry eye in the house when i give my eulogy.’**

**‘we’re doing this for Adrien’s sake! remember that you dramatic nut!’**

One fake funeral and cremation of good measure the Agreste’s moved away to a nice mansion to secretly raise Adrien. They hired a bodyguard as an extra precaution to make sure he wasn’t seen by anyone outside the grounds.

Eighteen years go by and Adrien wants out of the house bad! Despite his parents trying their best to raise him normally never having any actual friends kinda sucks.

The good news is that he is old enough that they can work on breaking the curse which the family interpreted as **‘being loved by someone of noble birth’** or some bs like that.

So they set up a system to bring girls to the mansion to get to know Adrien without ever seeing his face. To this end they also hire a renowned matchmaker named, Nathalie, to help pick girls she thinks Adrien would be compatible with. Then when Adrien thinks that they have enough of a connection he reveals his face to them.

The results always end in the girls high-tailing it out of the mansion before being stopped by the body guard and taken back to sign a non-disclosure agreement.

One day Adrien is talking to this girl, Chloe. They’ve had quite a few meetings and Chloe desperately wants to see what Adrien looks like.

**‘oh please won’t you come out my Adrikins! i want to see what you look like.’**

Adrien hoping for the best but braced for the inevitable steps into the room with Chloe revealing his piggy snout and floppy pig ears.

**‘hiya Chloe!’**

**‘NOPE!’** Chloe nopes out of there so fast that the body guard isn’t able to catch her and she makes it home without signing the non-disclosure agreement.

Adrien’s parents who have been watching the meetings via a security cam in the next room sigh as another girl runs for the hills. When the body guard informs them that Chloe got away Emilie is smacking her head against the table.

**‘i told you we should have them sign the document before meeting him.’**

Adrien comes in and sits down next to his family.

**‘i’m not even surprised anymore.’**

**‘it’s okay, sweetie.’** his mom assures him, **‘we’ll find the right girl.’**

**‘what if there is no right girl? every girl i meet runs away. it’s never going to change.’**

Adrien locks himself in his room to brood and sulk about his unfortunate circumstance.

Meanwhile Chloe is blowing up her social media by telling everyone that the quiet but prominent family, the Agreste’s have a pig faced secret son. Everyone calls her a loon except for one blogger that fully believes that Adrien Agreste is alive and has a pig face.

The girls get in touch and it is revealed the blogger, Alya, has a mom that got seriously injured and arrested for trying to expose the Agreste’s secret. Alya is now obsessed with it so to prove her mom’s suspicions right and teams up with Chloe to expose the truth.

**‘you don’t think i’m crazy?!’** Chloe is taken aback.

**‘my mama got clubbed with a surprisingly sharp stiletto trying to prove the Agreste kid was a pig. trust me when i say i believe you.’**

Here Alya and Chloe come across a designer named Marinette who is struggling to make rent. They promise her a large sum of cash if she can infiltrate the Agreste mansion and get a picture of Adrien.

**‘i don’t know.’** Marinette steps away from them, **‘this all sounds really gross and underhanded.’**

**‘i can give you rent for the next five years if you do this.’** Chloe says.

**‘so do these dates have a dress code or what should i wear?’** Marinette doesn’t like the idea of manipulating this guy but rent needs paid and working part-time in a bakery is not covering the bills. And who knows. Maybe this Adrien guy will turn out to be pretty cool.


	2. Chapter 2

It is easy to sneak Marinette into a meeting in the Agreste mansion since they are having a large group of girls come in. Marinette is outfitted with a spy camera disguised as a ladybug brooch. A live feed directing straight back to Chloe and Alya so that they can keep an eye on things and finally get their proof.

**Alya: let’s go over this one more time. what is your alias?**

**Marinette; i am Marinette Cheng, a young descendant of the Qing dynasty.**

**Alya: good**

**Marinette: and you’re sure they’re not going to fact check that i am actually descended from chinese nobility?**

**Alya: can you speak chinese?**

**Marinette: it’s my first language**

**Alya: if they start coming at you just start going at them in mandarin.**

**Marinette: i speak whenzhouhua**

**Chloe: you just said you spoke chinese!**

**Marinette: there are other dialects of chinese Chloe!**

Marinette gets inside and slots herself amongst the other other girls in the waiting room as they filled out non-disclosure forms. this felt foreboding. Marinette drops her pen under the couch and gets down to find it.

**Emilie: Adrien, sweetie, tell me again why you wanted to see all the girls at once instead of one at a time?**

**Adrien: easier to weed out the unlikely**

**Emilie: …if you say so…**

**Girls waiting in the next room: how ugly does this guy have to be that we have to sign this stuff?**

**Adrien walking out into the room: hello ladies!**

**Girls: Oh hell no! nope! nope! nopity no!**

All the girls peace out at neck break speeds. Marinette is still on the floor trying to reach the pen under the couch. She stays hidden behind the couch as all the girls flee the room.

Adrien walks back out of the room to the kitchen singing unaware Marinette is still there.

**Adrien: another one bites the dust! and another one gone! and another one gone! ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST!**

**Gabriel: ADRIEN!**

**Adrien: hey. do we have anymore eclairs?**

**Gabriel: why did you do that?**

**Adrien: just speeding up the process**

**Gabriel: so now you’re just going to make a pig of yourself?**

**Adrien: no, that’s been done for me!**

**Emilie: Gabe, you are not helping. Adrien, sweetheart…why?**

**Adrien: I am not the bad guy here! they’re the ones that ran away!**

**Emilie: they are going to run away if you just spring yourself on them like that**

**Gabriel: exactly, you think I showed your mother my birthmark shaped like a giraffe raking leaves on the first date? No! I had the good sense to wait till we were married!**

**Adrien: I didn’t show them my birthmark. I showed them my face.**

**Emilie: Adrien…**

**Nathalie: um…guys?**

**Gabriel: what is it?**

**Nathalie: there’s still one girl in the annex**

**All of them: WHAT?!**

They jump over each other to get to the screen showing the live feed into the waiting room. Lo and behold there sits Marinette on the couch.

**Adrien: did she see my face?**

**Gabriel: everyone else did. she must have too.**

**Emilie: and she’s still here!**

**Adrien: who is she?**

**Gabriel: who cares? just go!**

**Adrien: but i–**

**All the adults: GO!**

Adrien goes back to the room with its one way mirror and gazes at the one remaining girl in the room.

Marinette herself is getting bored and wondering if she should still be here since it’s been well over ten minutes and she hasn’t seen anyone since all the girls ran away. She adjusted the ladybug brooch on her jacket lapel and started perusing the room. Couch, couple arm chairs, bookcases, terrariums, and an old piano in the corner.

Adrien goes to the little microphone that lets him talk into the other room.

**Adrien: ummmm…hi?**

**Marinette: shit!**

Marinette startled and fell over the couch.

**Adrien: oh god are you okay?!?**

**Marinette: i’m fine!**

She jumped back to her feet

**Marinette: i’m used to taking worse tumbles**

**Adrien: who are you?**

**Marinette: Marinette**

**Adrien: did you see me, Marinette?**

**Marinette: no? i was trying to find my pen**

**Adrien: oh…**

**Marinette: so am I supposed to guess that you are Adrien?**

**Adrien: yeah, i’m Adrien.**

**Marinette: is there a reason you’re saying hello over a speaker?**

**Adrien: i guess i’m just shy**

**Marinette: so shy that you can’t let me see you?**

**Adrien: well…let’s just say you wouldn’t like what you see anyway**

**Marinette: can’t i make that decision for myself?**

Adrien had a choice to make. This girl was different from all the other girls he had met before. She seemed so much more relaxed and down to earth. He wasn’t a big believer in destiny but seeing as how his life consisted of being cursed by a witch decades before he was ever born he was willing to take a chance. She had to have remained after everyone fled for a reason.

**Adrien: maybe if you come back tomorrow**

**Marinette: is that an invitation?**

**Adrien: …yeah**

**Marinette: even if i come back tomorrow you’re not gonna come out of your hidey-hole, aren’t ya?**

**Adrien: yep**

**Marinette: then i guess i’ll speak to the wall more tomorrow.**

**Adrien: goodbye, Marinette**

**Marinette: see you later, voice of Adrien.**

She waved to the mirror he was hiding behind and left the house to be immediately ambushed by Alya and Chloe complaining about her hiding behind the couch when Adrien came out the first time.

**Marinette: chill out. i’m coming back tomorrow**

**Alya: you’re in?**

**Marinette: yepper pepper! now to celebrate how about you two treat me to lunch?**

Inside Adrien was still staring out into the now empty room with a small smile on his face. The adults in the other room are cheering amongst themselves. and chanting.

**Adults: SHE’S COMING BACK! SHE’S COMING BACK!**


	3. Chapter 3

And so Marinette came back the next day and the next day and every day for over a week. Every day she and Adrien would talk and Marinette was finding herself pleasantly surprised by the boy on the other side of the mirror. He was kind and funny and overall charming.

Adrien asked her what she was planning to do with her future and she admitted that she was interested in fashion. More specifically, she wanted to design a certain type of clothing and challenged Adrien to guess. If he could guess correctly she would make him something.

**Adrien: you are offering the son of a fashion designer clothing as a reward?**

**Marinette: do you want the prize or not?**

**Adrien: yes please**

Day by day Adrien was starting to trust her more and Marinette was starting to feel guilty. Chloe was getting impatient trying to get their proof and accused Marinette of trying to weasel her way into the Agreste fortune. Alya calmed her down and sent Marinette in once more.

**Adrien: okay, i think i got the answer today! You want to be a hat maker.**

**Marinette: it only took you fifteen guesses but you finally got it**

**Adrien: really? you want to make hats?**

**Marinette: hats are cool**

**Adrien: so does that mean you’re gonna make me a hat?**

**Marinette: i’ll make you something**

Truth be told she had already made a gift for him. It was a sky blue scarf that she had knitted. It wasn’t done yet but she was confident she could finish it in the next day or so.

**Marinette: Adrien, what do you want to do with your life?**

**Adrien: what do you mean?**

**Marinette: well you know that I want to be a fashion designer. what do you want to do? what are your plans?**

**Adrien: the only plans i’ve ever had is to get married. that’s what my parents have been raising me for anyway**

**Marinette: why is it so important that you get married?**

There is an uncomfortably long silence and Marinette is worried she may have scared him away. She starts to leave when his voice comes back over the speakers.

**Adrien: because i’m cursed**

Marinette sat back down by the mirror and listened as he explained the curse without ever mentioning what it was the curse did to him. she touches a finger to the mirror.

Thanks to Chloe and Alya, Marinette already knew what the curse was but she hadn’t realized until now why it was so important that all the girls Adrien meets have to be of some kind of nobility. The curse could only be broken by him being accepted and loved by one of his own kind. A blue blood.

That wasn’t Marinette. As much as she was coming to genuinely like Adrien…she could never break his curse.

**Emilie: oooooooh! i have a good feeling about this one! she’s such a sweet girl!**

**Gabriel: she has an interest in the fashion industry too. that could do wonders for the company**

**Nathalie: anyone notice she wears the same brooch everyday? it’s been almost 2 weeks and she wears that brooch every single day. does no one find that weird?**

The day Marinette finished the scarf she stopped to get her spy brooch from Chloe and Alya. She voiced her concerns about exposing Adrien like this. It didn’t feel right. At that Chloe started laying into her about it wasn’t what Marinette wanted. She was only there because they were paying her to be. So if she wanted to go back to barely scraping by to cover rent on her crappy apartment then she could by all means. But Chloe had been the laughing stock for too long. Everyone was going to know that she wasn’t crazy and that Adrien Agreste was a snout faced, ugly, pig boy one way or another.

**Marinette: what did you call him?**

**Chloe: a vicious, snout faced, ugly, pig boy!**

**Alya, trying to hold Marinette back: whoa! Marinette! calm down!**

**Marinette: you are such a bitch!**

**Chloe: get her away from me!**

**Alya: Marinette, girl, cool down! ignore her!**

**Marinette: just one good punch! that’s all i need!**

After calming down and getting at least a good kick in the shin at Chloe, Marinette headed back into the mansion with her gift for Adrien.

**Adrien: is that for me?**

**Marinette tripped and stumbled to the ground once more.**

**Marinette: i really wish you would stop doing that.**

**Adrien: is that my prize?**

**Marinette: yep**

She approached the mirror.

**Marinette: is there a slot to put it through or what?**

**Adrien: no but…um…would you close your eyes?**

**Marinette: why?**

**Adrien: just do this for me. please.**

**Marinette: okay, they’re closed**

Marinette closed her eyes tight. A minute later she heard the door between the two rooms open and her heart sped up. He had come out. She could feel him standing close to her. His hands rested on her shoulders.

**Adrien: is this okay?**

Marinette grabbed his arms and wrapped them around her middle and leaned back into him.

**Marinette: very okay**

His chin rested on the top of her head. He was a good head taller then her by approximation and with him this close she could even tell what he smelled like. Fabric softener and just the tiniest hint of chocolate.

Slowly she opened her eyes. Staring ahead at the mirror she brought her gaze up the reflection to see the boy standing behind her. Tall, messy blonde hair, bright green eyes, and wide pig snout.

This is what all those girls had run away from? Sure it was noticeable and upon closer inspection she could make out his matching pig ears poking from his hair but it wasn’t bad. It was rather shocking but why would anyone be scared of him? He was handsome and even his snout was kinda adorable.

Their gazes were locked in the mirror. Neither moving as Marinette got used to the face before her. Then her eye caught a glint of something in the mirror. The brooch. The camera!

**Marinette: shit!**

She darted away to take it off.

**Adrien: i knew it…i knew it…**

**Marinette: Adrien! Wait! ADRIEN!**

She chucked the brooch away and raced after him.


	4. Chapter 4

They all ran away. No one ever stayed. Why should he have expected this time to be any different?

**Gabriel: Adrien! Adrien!**

**Emilie: Adrien, sweetie, please don’t do this!**

**Adrien: NO! you saw what happened! she just stood there staring at me. no one has ever just stood there.**

**Gabriel: to give the girl a chance to adjust. i mean can you really blame–**

**Emilie: wait. is no one is watching Marinette?**

Marinette was speeding down the halls of the mansion looking for Adrien. She shouldn’t have done this! She should have never agreed to Chloe and Alya’s plan! Now she had hurt Adrien. She had to do something to make this right. Even if she couldn’t break his curse he had to know that she wasn’t disgusted or afraid of him.

**Nathalie: Miss Cheng!**

**Marinette: who are you?**

**Nathalie: Nathalie, i arrange the dates. please don’t leave. if you just give him a chance–**

**Marinette: where is he? i tried to follow him but this house is too freaking big!**

The rest of the Agrestes came running around the corner following Adrien. Adrien stopped abruptly when he saw her there.

**Adrien: Marinette…**

**Marinette: Adrien, about what happened back there–**

**Adrien: i understand, Marinette. but i swear this**

He gestured to his face.

**Adrien: this isn’t me. the real me is under this and he just wants to get out and live his life. and that can happen if the curse is broken. this will all go away and we can have a normal life together. just say you’ll marry me.**

The guilt was eating her alive.

**Marinette: and what if…what if the curse isn’t broken? what happens to us then?**

**Adrien: i’ll kill myself. i promise.**

**Marinette: you melodramatic moron. i don’t want you to kill yourself! why is that the first place your mind went?**

**Emilie: he gets it from his father. it was his dad’s idea to fake his death as an infant after all**

**Adrien: Marinette, please**

He knelt down in front of her.

**Adrien: i really like you. say you’ll marry me. please. marry me, Marinette.**

**Marinette: i…i can’t…**

His eyes filled with tears. He stood up and marched away without as much as a glance back.

**Marinette: wait! Adrien! let me explain! Adrien!**

**Gabriel: get her out of here!**

Despite her struggling Marinette was tossed out of the house by the big burly body guard. Her own tears falling as she was locked outside. This wasn’t fair! She liked Adrien. Maybe even loved him. It couldn’t just end like this.

Chloe and Alya were waiting by the closed gate.

**Alya: what are you doing? get back in there!**

**Marinette: did you see?**

**Chloe: no. the image cut off at his chin. so you need to get back in there and–**

**Marinette: no!**

**Chloe: excuse you?**

**Marinette: he is nothing like what you said. he’s not a freak and the both of you are going to leave him alone. for good.**

**Alya: Marinette, girl, this is what we have been working towards! you want to get paid or not?**

**Marinette: i won’t help you hurt him. he is a good man and the both of you are vultures. you’re the reason he feels, that his whole family feels, that he can’t set foot in public. congratulations. i hope the both of you are proud.**

Marinette stormed back to her apartment and collapsed into her bed for a good cry. Everything was ruined.

Back at the mansion Adrien’s parents were already working with Nathalie to look for someone new. Adrien didn’t want any part and wandered back to the waiting room. Marinette’s present to him was still resting by the mirror.

He picked it up and opened it. Inside was a long blue scarf.

It was then that Adrien realized something. His parents would never stop. They would search and search and search for a blue blooded girl to marry him to break his curse until the day he died. It would never change. Nothing would ever change. Not if he stayed here.

He raced back into his room and grabbed a duffel bag out of the closet and stuffed it with clothes, some toiletries, a couple books, and his emergency rainy day fund. He grabbed a hat and tucked the tips of his floppy ears inside.

That night after everyone had gone to bed he made his way out of the house. He wrapped the blue scarf around his face so no one could see his snout and pried open the back gate.

He hadn’t a clue where he was going or what he was going to do but he had a warm scarf and a new world to explore. And that seemed as good a place to start.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning Emilie went to go check on Adrien and found his room empty. A note was left on his bed saying good bye to his parents.

**Emilie: oh fuck…GABRIEL!**

Emilie ran down stairs with the note clutched tightly in her hand.

**Emilie: Gabe! he’s gone!**

**Gabriel: what’s gone?**

**Emilie: Adrien is gone! he’s run away!**

She thrust the note at him.

**Gabriel: well technically he’s a legal adult so i don’t think he could have run away but rather abruptly left–**

**Emilie: Gabe, focus! our boy is out there on his own with no comprehension of how the world works. we raised him for when the curse was broken but we never raised him for if the curse was never broken.**

**Gabriel: we’ll find him. we’ll find him and bring him home and stop all this matchmaking business. maybe get him a cat.**

**Emilie: that’s your grand plan to make him feel better about constantly being rejected from every girl he meets and ostracized by society? a cat?**

**Gabriel: …what about a hamster?**

**Emilie: sweet baby beelzebub, call the police Gabe! we need to get him back before he gets picked up by crazy scientists or beat up by hoodlums!**

**Gabriel: or cornered by a butcher**

**Emilie: …you’re sick man…you’re sick**

Using his money Adrien got a hotel room to live out of for the time being. He knew he was gonna have to find some source of income if he wanted to stay out in the world but for now he just wanted to have fun. With his ears and snout hidden he could go anywhere and no one paid him any mind.

He saw all the sights he had only been able to see through the internet. Bought all the junk food his parents never let in the house. He went out and saw a movie at a real theater. There were so many things he wanted to do and there didn’t seem to be enough hours in the day to do it.

While out at a park a dog came running up to him followed by its worried owner. A nice guy by the name of Nino. His dog, Rena, had slipped her collar and taken off.

**Nino: Rena, don’t do that to daddy. your mom would kill me if something happened to you**

**Adrien: you okay?**

**Nino: i’m fine. thanks for catching her. my girlfriend would decapitate me if i let anything happen to her**

**Adrien: not a problem. do you mind if i ask you a question?**

**Nino: sure scarfy**

**Adrien: do you know any jobs someone with no experience could get where i don’t have to take off this scarf?**

**Nino: i was gonna ask about that. what is with the scarf?**

**Adrien: short version is my ancestors screwed me over**

**Nino: ah, the curse of genetics. what is it? big nose? large nostrils?**

**Adrien: something like that**

**Nino: can you ride a bike?**

**Adrien: yeah**

**Nino: cool, my family’s shop could use a deliver guy if you’re interested. no experience needed and you can wear the scarf as much as you want.**

**Adrien: thanks man!**

Adrien followed Nino back to his family’s stationery shop and was given a run down on what his responsibilities would be working there. The family in the shop made the cards, business cards, wrapping paper, personalized stationery, what have you and then Adrien would deliver it to the house. One signature to make sure they got it and it was off to the next delivery. Thank god he spent so many hours walking around using Google maps or else he’d have no idea where he was going.

A couple days into his new life he hit a small snag. The day Nino’s girlfriend came to the store. A journalist by the name of Alya who was loudly complaining about another girl named Chloe.

**Alya: Nino, i swear, i am going to murder this chick**

**Nino: is this that noble girl that claims that the Agreste’s have a secret son with a pig head? why are you still talking to her? i thought your plans to get a picture of him bombed**

**Alya: they did. but Chloe insists that i have to find a way to prove that she’s not crazy. i asked my mom for advice and she bit my head off when she learned what i was doing. she stopped caring about the Agrestes a long time ago and was pissed that i was trying to harass them**

**Nino: and the girl you hired? hear anything back from her?**

**Alya: nope. Marinette is in the wind.**

At that Adrien dropped an entire stack of custom envelopes. Marinette. Nino’s girlfriend knew Marinette? But more importantly, Alya had hired Marinette? And what was this about Chloe? Was it the same Chloe that got away from the house before signing the nondisclosure agreement? It would make sense. But then how did Marinette fit into…oh…she was a spy.

**Nino: you okay, scarfy?**

**Adrien: butterfingers. ignore me.**

Adrien collected the envelopes off the ground and went to make his usual deliveries. All that time he thought Marinette and him were actually connecting and here she had been hired to flirt with him. Hired to get his trust and expose him. Well, if Chloe wanted her damn proof then she was gonna get it.

After his last delivery he went to the Bourgeois manor and knocked on the door. It took some smooth talking but he eventually got his way in. Chloe came into the room demanding to know who he was and what he wanted.

He took off the scarf.

**Adrien: you want your proof or not, Bourgeois?**

After a conversation where Chloe kept a wide berth from him, the two came to an agreement. If Chloe stopped bothering Alya and paid her for her services then he would give her all the proof she wanted. Chloe agreed.

One video of Adrien saying hello to the world and proving that this was in fact what he looked like and that Chloe wasn’t crazy and he was done. He put his hat and scarf back on and went back to his life.

Weeks went by and Adrien was really starting to settle into his new life. The news exploded after the video of him presenting himself to the world was posted. Yet Adrien himself was never harassed. With everyone looking for a snout no one was paying attention to the guy in the blue scarf.

He regularly sent post cards to his parents telling him about the new things he was experiencing and assuring him he was fine. He knew they must be worried but he hoped that these little notes helped lessen that.

Every now and again he thought of Marinette. Tried to shake the thought of her from his head but he couldn’t deny he missed her in a way. It couldn’t all have been fake…could it?

**Nino: Adrien, got your list of deliveries today.**

Nino handed him his list. There was a new place on the list. Dupain-Cheng Bakery. He had rode past that building a hundred times but he never went in. Seems like that would change. Maybe he could get some chouquettes or eclairs while he was there.

He set off on his deliveries and eventually pulled up to the bakery. The scent of fresh baked bread could be smelled from outside.

He walked inside with the box of business cards and accidentally tripped up one of the workers. She fell to the ground sending the tray of macarons flying into the air.

**Adrien: i am so sorry! are you okay?**

She looked up and they both froze.

**Marinette: Adrien?**


	6. Chapter 6

Why out of everyone in this city he could run into it had to be Marinette? Was this some sort of sick joke from the universe? And to add insult to injury she was still flipping adorable with her big blue eyes and cute pink apron!

How did she realize it was him though? He had the scarf and hat on.

**Adrien: who? i don’t know an Adrien**

Maybe he could fake his way out of this.

**Marinette: but the scarf…**

Crap!

**Adrien: this old thing? what about it? i’ve had it for ages**

**Marinette: sorry. i guess i was mistaken. you reminded me of someone else**

She started picking the macarons up off the floor. Why did seeing her again make him so sad yet filled his belly full of butterflies? Adrien went up to the counter and handed over the business cards to the nice man behind the counter. He was about to walk out to continue on with his deliveries when he looked back at Marinette. She had another tray of macarons she was putting away in one of the display cases.

**Adrien: uh…hey, if i were to get myself a snack, what would you suggest?**

Marinette looked up at him surprised. Her face softening into a small smile. The butterflies in his stomach started fluttering around more aggressively.

Adrien was able to relax as he stole a couple minutes trailing behind Marinette as she showed him the different treats in the bakery. He ended up buying a variety box of macarons as well as another box with some cream puffs and egg custards.

It wasn’t until after he left that he wondered why the daughter of a noble was working at a bakery. Well it was called the Dupain-Cheng bakery. Maybe her parents were co-owners and she was getting work experience.

After that day he couldn’t help but pop into the bakery at least once a week to grab some treats and talk to Marinette. If she recognized him she didn’t say anything. When she asked for his name one day he panicked and said his name was Felix.

Adrien told his new friend Nino about what was going on after he got comfortable enough to show him who he was. Nino told him to drop the act and talk to Marinette which felt easier said then done. But over the course of talking to Marinette he figured Nino was right. After getting to know her without the expectation that she break his curse looming over them he found himself falling for her all over again.

**Adrien: she’s just so cute and sweet and smart and she always smells like fresh baked cookies–**

**Nino: she works in a bakery**

**Adrien: and whenever i come in she smiles at me and calls me kitty**

**Nino: kitty?**

**Adrien: cause my beanie has cat ears on it**

**Nino: if you like her that much just talk to her. clear the air.**

**Adrien: but things didn’t go well the last time i saw her as Adrien**

**Nino: not to sound like i’m siding with your parents buuuuuuuuuuuut i’m siding with your parents**

**Adrien: Nino!**

**Nino: it sounds like you overreacted when she jumped away from you**

**Adrien: then why didn’t she agree to marry me?**

**Nino: you guys got to know each other through one way glass for like three weeks and the second you thought the relationship was in peril you asked her to marry you. WHY WOULD SHE HAVE SAID YES?!**

**Adrien: …to break the curse…and…we liked each other….?**

**Nino: dude**

**Adrien: it wasn’t my best moment! i get that!**

He knew Nino was right though. If he wanted things with Marinette to go anywhere then he needed to talk to her. And that’s exactly what he was gonna do.

His next day off he hopped on his bike and sped off to the bakery to see her. He could see the bakery up ahead. It’s soft colors and sweet smell calling to him like a lighthouse in a storm.

Then the car hit him.

When he woke up he was in an ambulance and his body ached all over. There was a terrible throbbing in his head. The lights were bright and the noise of a siren was an assault on his senses.

A few minutes later he was being carted off the ambulance and rushed into a hospital. Some really strong pain meds and a lot of bandages later he was feeling better. Not great but he was still intact so that was good.

As much as he longed for his independence he knew he couldn’t keep this from his parents. He got hit by a car for god’s sake! Not to mention everyone who must have seen him.

Wait! The scarf! Where had his scarf gone? He looked around the hospital room but didn’t see it. He asked a nurse but she didn’t report any scarf among his possessions when he was brought in.

It wasn’t long after Adrien asked the hospital to call his parents that they came barreling into his room. Tears of pain or relief in their eyes as they tried to hug him without hurting him.

After about the fifth time Adrien assured them that he was fine is when his mom blew a gasket.

**Emelie: two months Adrien! two months with only post cards to let us know you were okay!**

**Adrien: mom, i’m sorry**

**Emelie: if it wasn’t for the fact that you just got hit by a car i’d be slapping the crap out of the dumb head of yours!**

**Gabriel: Emelie, dearest, take a walk**

His mom stepped aside to pace and his dad sat down next to him.

**Gabriel: we understand that what happened with Marinette hurt and that this whole matchmaking business to break your curse was only hurting you more. but we only did what we thought was right for you. you could have come talked to us**

**Adrien: and what would you have done? got me a cat to keep me company while i stayed cooped up in the house?**

**Gabriel: i mean…would you have liked a cat?**

**Adrien: …honestly i’d prefer a hamster but a cat is good too**

**His dad pointed back at his mom in triumph.**

**Gabriel: AHA! I TOLD YOU!**

**Emelie: Gabe, keep it up and Adrien won’t be the only one in need of medical attention**

**Gabriel: noted. sorry darling. i love you.**

After Adrien was cleared to leave he left the hospital with his parents. They had come to an agreement that until he was fully healed he would come back home to stay. Upon leaving the hospital though they were assaulted with press and paparazzi clamoring for a photo or word from Adrien.

They also kept out yelling absurd questions like if he had been locked in a cage in the basement or if his snout let him smell better than others. Adrien stopped for a moment to assure the press that he was well taken care of and didn’t know if his nose had super smell. In that moment Adrien realized that his parents had been wrong. These people weren’t running. They wanted to get closer. They wanted to see him. Know him.

All week the news was obsessed with Adrien and getting to know him. He had basically become an overnight celebrity. Not that all the news was good. Chloe had scoffed at the reporters when they asked about her relationship with Adrien. She had enough grace to not say anything horrible outright but her physical disgust just thinking about Adrien came through loud and clear.

While the attention was a nice change of pace, excluding Chloe’s opinion, all Adrien could think about was getting out and going back to his new life. He desperately wanted to go see Marinette again. Surely she must have seen the news. The crash happened right outside her bakery too. She had to know it was him.

When the day came that he could get around again without being in pain Adrien packed a few things to leave. It was at that precise moment someone came calling to the house. Adrien figured it was Nino come to pick him up.

The voice he heard in the entry hall didn’t sound like Nino though. It was higher. Suddenly his heart sped up. He knew that voice.


	7. Chapter 7

Adrien grabbed his bag and went downstairs. Mayor Bourgeois and Chloe were standing in the entrance hall. He was hoping that he could get out without making a scene but when he saw his parents were also there he knew that wasn’t gonna happen. What was the Bourgeois family even doing here?

**Emelie: Adrien, sweetheart, perfect timing**

**Adrien: what’s going on?**

**Gabriel: Chloe and her father are here to see you**

**Adrien: ok…why?**

**Mayor Bourgeois: Chloe has something to ask of you**

**Chloe: no i don’t**

**Mayor Bourgeois: yes you do**

Chloe rolled her eyes but stepped forward. She had a visibly hard time looking directly at Adrien. Then she pulled a little box out of her purse and opened it. Inside was a platinum ring.

**Chloe: Adrien, will you marry me?**

**Adrien: what the fuck? no!**

**Gabriel: Adrien!**

**Adrien: what? i don’t want to marry her and i know for a fact she doesn’t want to marry me.**

**Mayor Bourgeois: of course she does. isn’t that right princess?**

**Chloe: …yeah…totally…really want to…y’know…marry him…**

There was a knock at the door and Adrien jumped at the distraction. Nino was outside waiting to pick him up. Oh thank god!

**Adrien: my ride’s here! gotta go. love ya mom and dad. totally not marrying Chloe. see ya!**

Adrien grabbed Nino and hightailed it out to his car. They jumped in and sped off. They were already down the street when Adrien noticed that Alya was in the back seat. While Adrien had shown Nino who he really was he had avoided telling Alya. Now that everyone knew and Alya was Nino’s girlfriend he couldn’t hide anymore.

**Adrien: uh…hi?**

**Alya: hey…i’m sorry for sending a spy into your house to get a picture of you**

**Adrien: i forgive you. in a weird way it was the final shove that got me out into the world**

**Nino: and to celebrate your not deadness and the fact that you are free to live as you want we are going out tonight! no beanie! no scarf! no rules!**

The trio cheered but for Adrien it all felt a bit hollow. He was happy that everyone wasn’t running away and liked him but that didn’t change things with Marinette. He wanted to talk to her but now that his identity was out how could he go back to see her? What if she was just like Chloe and only sucked up to him because the public liked him? He couldn’t deal with that kind of heartbreak again.

In a different car leaving the mansion Mayor Bourgeois was not at all happy with his daughter. After all her comments about how ugly and disgusted she found Adrien the press turned on her. How could she hate the freak of Paris? The pig can speak ten languages. The pig knows how to make paella. The pig loves hamsters. The pig this! The pig that! Adrien the pig everything!

**Mayor Bourgeois: what kind of a lackluster proposal was that?**

**Chloe: the only reason i went along with your dumb idea is because you said you’d cut me off if i didn’t jump on the ‘we-love-the-pig-boy’ bandwagon the rest of the nation is driving**

**Mayor Bourgeois: well if you hadn’t embarrassed all of us with your Adrien hating escapades we wouldn’t be in this mess. the entire nation loves that boy and if i am going to get re-elected then you are going to love him too**

**Chloe: too bad since he obviously doesn’t want to marry me. boo-hoo so sad**

**Mayor Bourgeois: either fix this or your credit cards turn to confetti**

That night Alya, Nino, Adrien, and a couple dozen Adrien fans crowded into a bar to party the night away. Nino was ordering another round of drinks. Alya was still waiting in line for the women’s restroom. And Adrien was back at the dart board trying in vain to land a bullseye.

He heard Nino calling for him back by the bar. When Adrien found him though he wasn’t alone. Next to him was Marinette with a pink box in her hands. Why was Marinette here? Nino saw him hesitating and pulled him forward.

**Nino: you can thank me later**

**Adrien: Nino!**

But Nino had already disappeared back into the crowd. He turned back to Marinette with a nervous smile.

**Adrien: hi**

**Marinette: hi**

**Adrien: what are you doing here?**

**Marinette: Nino invited me. i also needed to see you**

**Adrien: yeah?**

**Marinette: yeah. what you’re doing, making a life of your own, it’s great.**

**Adrien: it was going pretty well until i get hit by that car but–shit happens**

**Marinette: i saw that. really scared me when i saw you lying out on the street. i wanted to visit you while you were in the hospital but the entire building was swarmed with reporters and i didn’t even know if you would have wanted to see me so…yeah**

Did she…did she actually care? It seemed so. As much as he wanted to believe that this was all genuine there was still that nagging voice in the back of his head telling him to keep his guard up.

**Adrien: Marinette, can we–**

Adrien was cut off by someone shoving their way between him and Marinette. He looked down and realized it was Chloe. What did she want now? How had she even found out what bar he was at?

**Chloe: hey, Adrikins, got a minute?**

She was pressing herself up against him and batting her eyelashes. Her gaze he noticed was focused a little over his head so she wasn’t looking directly at his face.

**Adrien: Chloe, what are–**

**Chloe: do you want your curse broken or not?**

**Adrien: i mean yes but–**

**Chloe: then marry me. simple as that.**

**Adrien: Chloe, this isn’t a good time. i was in the middle of talking to someone**

**Marinette: it’s okay. i was just about to leave**

Marinette pressed the box she had been holding into his hands.

**Marinette: sorry i couldn’t get the stains out**

**Adrien: Marinette! wait!**

But she was gone again.

Adrien looked down at what she had given him. It was his scarf. The one he though he lost. There was a change though. All around where he figured there must have been blood stains were now little black cat patches and paw prints. Marinette had been out there with him. She had taken the scarf to fix it.

**Chloe: Adrien**

Chloe snapped his focus back to her.

**Chloe: listen, i don’t want to do this. you don’t want to do this. divorce exists for a reason. let’s just get it over with**

**Adrien: you cannot be serious**

**Chloe: unfortunately i am. what do you have to lose? we get hitched, you get rid of your curse, the public loves me again, and then we can go our separate ways**

**Adrien: …i don’t know…**

**Chloe: do you want to be normal or not?**

**Adrien: i do**

**Chloe: great**

**Chloe pulled the ring out of her pocket and slipped it on his finger.**

**Chloe: see you at the alter then**

With that Chloe walked back out the door. Nino came up to him with a wide smile and Alya hooked on his arm.

**Nino: so how’d it go?**

Adrien held up his hand with the ring.

**Adrien: apparently i’m engaged now**


	8. Chapter 8

Nino and Alya stared at Adrien for a solid minute and the engagement ring on his finger. Finally it was Nino that broke out of the trance first.

**Nino: ok…what the hell did we miss?**

Adrien informed them what transpired with Chloe and Marinette.

**Nino: let me get this straight. i invite the girl you are crushing on to your party so you can make up and you end up engaged to the girl you despise?**

**Adrien: yeah pretty much**

**Nino: i’m going to kill you**

**Adrien: marrying her will break my curse**

**Nino: if you wanted a quickie marriage to break the curse then why not just ask Marinette again? i know it didn’t work out the first time but if the curse–**

**Alya: um, babe, i never told you did i?**

**Nino: told me what?**

**Alya: guys, Marinette isn’t a blue blood**

**Adrien: come again?**

Alya took Nino and Adrien outside where it was quieter to explain the situation. Marinette Cheng, heiress and descendant of the Qing dynasty wasn’t real. Marinette Dupain-Cheng, daughter of local bakers and struggling to make rent fashion design student was real. Chloe and Alya, had hired Marinette to sneak in under an alias and get a picture of Adrien using a live video camera hidden in the ladybug brooch she always wore to the dates.

It all finally clicked into place. Why Marinette worked at a bakery. Why she had always seemed so down to earth on their dates. Why she had said no to his proposal.

**Adrien: she could never break my curse…that’s why she said no…**

**Alya: i’m sorry for all of this. i should have never gone chasing after what my mom let go. it only ended up hurting people**

**Adrien: i gotta go. i’ll talk to you guys later**

With that Adrien wandered away from the bar and out into the night. All night he paced the city thinking over what Alya had told him. He twisted the ring on his finger with a sigh. He could always marry Chloe and get the curse broken then go talk to Marinette.

He ran a hand over the scarf wrapped around his neck. Or he could say fuck it and call off the engagement before Chloe had a chance to tell anyone. He could find Marinette and talk this through. If what Alya said was true then she really didn’t care about his nose or his ears or the curse. She liked him. She liked the person he was and not what his appearance made him seem.

But then his thoughts bounced back to his parents. They had done everything in their power to shield him from a world that could have reacted horribly to him. They had changed their entire lives to keep him a secret. Spent a small fortune searching for a way to break his curse. If he had a way to make all that they had done worth it shouldn’t he take it?

Besides, what Chloe said was right. After the curse was broken they could just get divorced and then it wouldn’t matter. Unless of course the curse had some failsafe none of his family knew about that would regrow the snout and floppy ears the second the marriage was over. What if he got married, the curse broke, they divorced and it came back? What if the marriage had to be permanent?

This was all getting to be too much.

As the sun started to rise over the city Adrien finally started to make his way back to his apartment. It wasn’t anything special. A little nicer than what he would have been able to afford if it wasn’t for the fact his parents were giving him access to a small allowance to help with his living expenses.

He had just entered his bedroom and flopped onto the bed when his phone started going off. Nope! He turned it off and went to sleep. When he woke up it was well past noon. The shop was closed today so he didn’t need to worry about being late to work at least.

He glanced down at the ring still on his finger with a small grimace. He still needed to decide what he was going to do about that. He had two few options but neither came without down sides.

Option 1: Marry Chloe, break the curse, divorce, risk curse coming back and being married to Chloe permanently

Option 2: Call off the engagement, try to make up with Marinette, live forever with a pig face and disappoint his parents

Adrien went to his phone and turned it back on. Immediately his phone was flooded with notifications of unread texts and missed calls. This couldn’t be good.

The most seemed to be from his parents so he called his mom first.

**Emelie: hello sweetheart!**

**Adrien: hey mom, what is going on? my phone is blowing up**

**Emelie: sorry about that but we couldn’t get through and we were just so excited**

Adrien’s stomach sank.

**Adrien: excited about what?**

**Emelie: your engagement to Chloe! it’s all over the news!**

FUCK!

His dad’s voice came over the phone this time.

**Gabriel: Adrien, son, so proud of you for doing the right thing! don’t worry about planning, your mother and i are taking care of all of it.**

**Adrien: mom, dad, just hold on a second–**

**Emelie: and as for a ring for Chloe don’t worry I already went to the jeweler and found a perfect one. you can give it to her at the engagement party this weekend**

**Adrien: it hasn’t even been 24 hours! can we slow down for a moment? how have you two been able to plan all this in such a short time?**

**Gabriel: Adrien, we’ve been preparing for this day for over eighteen years. if at all possible we would have had a ceremony ready for tonight**

**Adrien: you guys sure do want me to marry Chloe that much huh?**

**Emelie: yes! the curse will be broken and you’ll finally be able to lead a normal life! it’s what we’ve always dreamed of**

**Adrien: right…what you always wanted. a nice normal life with a nice normal son.**

**Emelie: sweetheart, is something wrong? you don’t sound happy. this nightmare if finally going to end**

**Adrien: i am happy mom. really happy.**

**Gabriel: goodness Emelie, the poor idiot is probably hungover from partying last night. let him rest and when he’s sobered up he’ll sound a lot better**

Adrien wished he was hungover right now. It’d be a better reason for the pounding in his head.


	9. Chapter 9

Across town Marinette was in her own realm of torture. So much had happened in such a short time it didn’t seem fair. How was anyone supposed to deal with this sort of psychological warfare?

First there was when Adrien walked into her bakery with her scarf wrapped around his face. She knew it was him and was hurt when he tried to convince her otherwise. She knew his voice. She definitely knew how to spot her own work. But he didn’t want her to recognize him so she went along with it despite how it hurt. She was just so happy to see him and when he stopped in more often it filled her with hope. Hope that she could talk to him and tell him the truth about everything.

Then there was the day he got hit by the car. She had been cleaning the windows inside the shop when she heard a crash sound and people gathering in the street. She ran outside and was able to make out Adrien’s bike bent and crushed by the hit. She pushed through the crowd towards where he lay on the pavement. She unwrapped the scarf from his face and stayed with him until the ambulance arrived.

When she finally saw him again after he recovered her stress was through the roof. She got invited to Adrien’s party by his friend so she figured that Adrien knew about it. But when she got there it was made obvious that he had no idea she was coming. That didn’t make the following conversation any easier.

Right when she thought things were going well and they would have a chance to talk in walks Chloe making marriage proposals. That’s when it clicked.

Adrien could forgive her and they could start fresh but at the end of the day she couldn’t give him what he wanted. She couldn’t help him reach that life that he wanted. A life where he can walk down the street without being harassed or stared at. A life where people see him for the sweet and intelligent boy he is and not the snout on his face.

Waking up to the engagement announcement wasn’t a surprise but it still made her angry. Not at Adrien for accepting but at Chloe for doing it. She was only doing this to make herself look good. She didn’t actually love Adrien or wanted him to be happy. And she was going to tell her as much!

Likely there could have been better ways to do this but she had already snuck into the engagement party. No turning back now.

They were having the party at this fancy restaurant that Marinette’s uncle was the head chef at. With a little pleading she got in.

It took about two hours but Chloe finally entered the bathroom Marinette had been waiting in.

**Chloe: Dupain-Cheng? what on earth are you doing skulking in the bathroom?**

**Marinette: waiting for you**

**Chloe: really? how long have you been waiting in here hoping that i would walk in?**

**Marinette: that’s not important**

**Chloe: i feel like it is a little important**

**Marinette: Chloe, why are you doing this?**

**Chloe: going to the bathroom?**

**Marinette: marrying Adrien! you don’t even like him! you’re just doing it for publicity!**

**Chloe: as opposed to you who only spent time with him for money?**

**Marinette: that’s not how i left it**

**Chloe: but that’s how Adrien knows that you entered it. and a million of your crappy little scarves can’t fix a betrayal like that**

**Marinette: but breaking his curse can reverse all the verbal hate and physical disgust you’ve hurled at him since you saw him?**

**Chloe: what are you hoping to gain out of all this? are you hoping that Adrien will give up his one chance at happiness to spend his life as a freak with you?**

Marinette was at a loss. She hadn’t thought of why exactly she was here. She wanted to tell Chloe off but to what point? To tell her to call off the wedding and leave Adrien with his curse? She knew that wasn’t going to happen.

**Marinette: Chloe…just promise me one thing**

**Chloe: what?**

**Marinette: promise me that once the curse is broken and he gets that life he wants that you will treat him properly. he’s a good man and if he’s stuck with you then he deserves a wife that has some human decency.**

Marinette left the bathroom without waiting for an answer. She wouldn’t stop the wedding but she could at least guilt Chloe into being kinder.

Tears were welling in her eyes again and she moved to wipe them away unaware of where she was going. She collided into someone and stumbled back. She didn’t look to see who she ran into and moved around them with a mumbled apology.

A hand shot out and caught her before she could get away. She turned to see who had grabbed her and her heart jumped into her throat. Adrien. Of course it was Adrien.

**Adrien: Marinette? what are you doing here?**

**Marinette: i was–i just–i came to say congratulations, i guess.**

**Adrien: really?**

**Marinette: yeah…but i should be going now.**

**Adrien: don’t…please**

They stood still in the hallway just taking each other in. There was so much she wanted to say but it all felt pointless now. She was at his engagement party for goodness sake! If there was one place she wasn’t supposed to be it was here.

**Adrien: five minutes that’s all i’m asking for. please.**

**Emelie: Adrien? Adrien! there you are! i have the ring right here and–**

Adrien’s mom stopped short upon seeing Marinette. Her eyes narrowing.

**Emelie: should i call security?**

**Marinette: no. i was just leaving**

**Adrien: no she wasn’t.**

**Marinette: yes i was.**

She pried Adrien’s hand off her. The hurt look he sent her struck her to the core.

**Marinette: i’m sorry. for everything. i really am.**

With that Marinette turned and ran out of the restaurant. As she walked home she found solace in one thought. She at least got to apologize.


	10. Chapter 10

The day of Adrien’s wedding was upon him far sooner than he would have liked. His parents were not kidding when they said they were prepared for this day. They had set up a place for the ceremony in the garden of their estate, Gabriel had finished his suit, guests were arriving, and it felt like he couldn’t breathe.

His parents came into his room after he got dressed. He had to admit that he looked great but it couldn’t stop the anxiety flowing through his veins.

**Emelie: there’s my handsome boy!**

**Gabriel: how are you feeling, son?**

**Adrien: is it too late to track down the ancestor of the witch that cursed me and beg forgiveness?**

**Gabriel: it’s not that bad, Adrien**

**Adrien: you say that but i feel like i’m gonna puke**

**Emelie: if it makes you feel better your father actually puked on our wedding day**

**Gabriel: and for some reason no one had any mints so i just had to gargle water and snuck a frosting rose off the cake to make my breath better**

**Adrien: your lives are very colorful**

Adrien stared at himself in the mirror. He had been doubting this whole marriage idea since the start. Being ten minutes away from standing at an actual alter was another thing.

Was all this really worth it? He had given up so much and for what? For a normal life? Who says his life can’t be normal right now? Snout and all. What would he truly gain from this?

He followed his parents out of his room and outside to the garden. As he walked towards the alter he saw dozens of faces. All whispering and clamoring for a look at him as if he hadn’t already had his face plastered everywhere in the news.

He couldn’t help but feel like a show dog. A prized pig would be more appropriate ironically speaking.

He slipped into a sort of daze up until the music began. His head shot up as Chloe walked down the aisle.

Oh this felt wrong.

She got to him, a pained, fake smile stretched on her face.

**Adrien: care to make a run for it?**

**Chloe: i can barely breathe in this dress let alone run**

The ceremony started. The usual preamble from the officiant rambled on but Adrien was deaf to it. The hammering of his heart in his ears silencing everything else.

He wanted to leave. He wanted to go back to his apartment. He wanted to be back on his bike making deliveries and getting after work drinks with Nino. He wanted to stop at the bakery and see Marinette. He wanted to get back to his life.

**Officiant: Chloe, do you take this man to be your husband?**

**Chloe: yeah…i do…**

She cringed in on herself.

**Officiant: and do you, Adrien, take this woman to be your wife?**

He looked out over the crowd. His parents in the front row with expectant smiles and encouraging nods.

Them. This was all for them. Not just his parents but Chloe as well. This wasn’t about him and helping him. This was all to make their own lives easier. To make them feel comfortable around him. About going out with him. About letting the world see him.

The opinion of the entire world and what millions of people he would never meet meant more to everyone at this wedding than the feelings of the groom.

**Chloe: Adrien**

Chloe snapped his attention back.

**Chloe: the officiant had a question for you. remember?**

Adrien shook his head.

**Adrien: no. i can’t do this. i’m not doing this!**

He took off back up the aisle and ran inside. He could hear his parents rushing up the stairs after him as he locked himself in his room.

His heart was pounding and his hands were shaking but he never felt more relieved. Even when his parents came and started banging on his door.

**Gabriel: Adrien! Adrien! unlock this door right this instance!**

**Adrien: go away! just leave me alone!**

**Emelie: sweetheart, please! we are this close to a whole new life! a whole new you!**

**Gabriel: listen to your mother, Adrien! we are one ‘i do’ away from happily ever after!**

**Adrien: neither of you understand! neither of you care!**

He pounded his fist against the door.

**Adrien: i don’t want a new life or a new me. i’m happy now.**

Tears welling in his eyes.

**Adrien: i like myself the way i am**

Then the world went black.

When he woke up he was in bed. The sky outside as well as his room was dark.

What happened to him? Had he fainted? He sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. Last he remembered he had run away from his wedding and locked himself in his room.

He got up to splash some water on his face and find out what was going on. Maybe grab a piece of cake if it still remained downstairs.

He walked into the bathroom and switched on the light…and screamed.

**Emelie: Adrien!**

His mom came barreling into the bathroom followed by his dad. Both of which were clearly startled from a restful sleep.

**Emelie: what’s wrong?**

**Adrien: my–my–**

He pointed wordlessly to his face.

His parents faces softened and turned his face back towards the mirror. No big floppy ears poking out from his head. No big pig snout on his face. Just a normal nose and regular sized ears.

**Adrien: but how?**

**Emelie: you were accepted by one of your own kind, sweetie.**

**Gabriel: yourself**

**Adrien: oh…**

He continued to stare at his new reflection. A hysterical laughing bubbling in his throat before spilling out. He was doubled over the sink laughing like a maniac.

**Adrien: are you _FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!_ It was _THAT_ simple?!**


	11. Chapter 11

And so time moved on. No one knew where Adrien “Pig Face” Agreste had gone. Some say he skipped town after leaving Chloe at the alter. Others say he’s locked in the basement of the mansion. The more grim and theatrical stated the Chloe killed him in a heartbroken stupor and the guests ate him at the reception.

Adrien laughed at the last one. Was this how cryptids were made? Was he doomed to become a folktale? An urban myth?

In truth Adrien could have gone out and showed the world who he was now but he wanted some time to be just himself. Not Adrien Agreste the boy who beat his own curse. Adrien “No Longer A Pig Face” Agreste. For the first time in his life he could let the world see him and know that no one else was staring back at him.

**Gabriel: Adrien, how’s the packing going?**

**Adrien: it’s going**

**Gabriel: go faster if you would stop looking in the mirror**

**Adrien: i was just–**

**Emelie: we miss it too**

**Adrien: i’m still pissed that it was that simple to break my curse**

**Emelie: self love isn’t simple…but we could have made it easier for you**

**Adrien: mom–**

**Gabriel: she’s right. if we had just done our job as your parents and taught you to love yourself the way you are then maybe none of this would have happened**

**Adrien: none of us knew. it’s okay. what matters now is that we get our lives back on track. you don’t need to coddle me anymore**

**Gabriel: i am going to miss making pig puns though**

**Emelie: Gabe!**

**Adrien: it’s fine mom, i quite enjoyed his _‘pork roasts’_**

**Gabriel: i really did know how to _‘ham’_ it up**

**Emelie: are you two finished?**

**Gabriel: _‘sow what’_ if we aren’t?**

**Adrien: stop _‘hogging’_ all the jokes dad**

**Emelie: i hate the both of you**

The months rolled by and eventually everyone forgot about Adrien in lieu of some other celebrity gossip. Adrien had enrolled himself in university. Picked up his job doing deliveries again. Chloe had gotten her reputation back thanks to Adrien leaving her ‘heartbroken’ at the alter.

Everything in his life finally felt possible. Well except for that one little thing. Ever since the engagement party he had seen neither hide nor hair from Marinette and he was too chicken to go to the bakery.

**Nino: just go talk to her you walking disaster!**

**Adrien: it’s not that simple**

**Nino: it literally is**

**Adrien: i don’t know…after everything that’s happened…**

**Nino: worried she’s not gonna like you without the snout?**

**Adrien: no!**

**Nino: then why are you hesitating?**

**Adrien: every time i tried to talk to her she ran away. what if she doesn’t feel the same way and that’s why she kept running?**

**Nino: that’s it. i’m not dealing with your sad pining bullshit anymore! we’re settling this now!**

Nino was out of the apartment without another word. To where he went remained a mystery.

A couple days went by and Halloween was upon them. A lot of people were dressing up as Adrien this year. That is they wore blue scarves and pig masks and ears on their face. Adrien found it flattering and funny.

There was a huge Halloween party going on at the bar Nino and Adrien frequented. Even there Adrien saw multiple copies of his pig faced self getting drunk and gyrating to the Halloween mix Nino constructed. Among the copies was Adrien himself with a fake pig snout on.

Nino chuckled when he saw him in the mask.

**Adrien: what?**

**Nino: nothing, it’s just nice to see the old you again**

The night carried on and Adrien was starting to lose faith in Nino’s plan when a cold breeze signaled that someone new had entered the bar. He looked up and saw a girl with a tall hat and bright baby blue eyes standing at the door.

Marinette.

She sat down a couple seats away from him and ordered a drink. He waited until she was near finished before approaching her, not wanting to miss his in.

**Adrien: uh hi, this seat taken?**

He pointed at the empty seat next to her.

**Marinette: sure**

He ordered a drink for himself while also offering to refill Marinette’s. Seemed like she didn’t recognize him yet.

**Marinette: that’s awfully kind but you are barking up the wrong tree if you’re hoping this is a sexy mad hatter costume**

**Adrien: nope. not what i was thinking. you just looked kinda sad when you walked in and i’ve only seen you talk to the bartender**

**Marinette: i ran into my ex tonight**

**Adrien: oh?**

**Marinette: yep. keep running into him everywhere i go**

She poked the snout of his mask.

Marinette: kinda takes the fun out of the night when every time you turn around someone’s using your ex-boyfriend as a Halloween costume

**Adrien: you dated Adrien ‘Pig Nose’ Agreste?**

His heart flipped inside his chest hearing her refer to him that way.

**Marinette: not really i suppose. he technically was never my boyfriend but i do consider him an ex.**

**Adrien: you really liked him?**

**Marinette: yeah. maybe even loved him**

**Adrien: how come it didn’t work out?**

At this Marinette looked even sadder. Then she whispered in the most heartbreaking voice.

**Marinette: i couldn’t give him what he wanted**

**Adrien: and what did he want?**

**Marinette: to be free**

This time when she looked at him her eyes were narrowed and he gulped back his fear. Could she tell it was him?

Marinette took off her hat and put it on top of his head.

**Adrien: what’s this about?**

**Marinette: gauging how big your head is. the reason i could only make you a scarf before is because i didn’t know how big your head was dummy**

**Adrien: you–you–**

**Marinette: word of advice, Agreste**

She pulled on his scarf so she could trace over the little cat patches on it.

**Marinette: if your goal isn’t to be recognized maybe don’t wear yourself as a disguise**

**Adrien: Marinette, I–**

She leaned across and kissed him. He kissed her back with fervor. Melting into the soft touch of her hand on his cheek. Her lips were warm and she tasted like fresh apple cider.

**Marinette: i’m sorry**

**Adrien: don’t be**

**Marinette: no, i don’t have the power to break your curse!**

**Adrien: heh, yeah, about that**

He removed his mask.

**Adrien: turns out i had the power all along. loving myself for who i am and all that nonsense**

She poked his human nose with a laugh.

**Marinette: when did that happen?**

**Adrien: about two minutes after i left Chloe at the alter**

Marinette’s laughter slowly bubbled back down.

**Marinette: i’m also sorry for lying to you. i never meant to hurt you**

**Adrien: i know. but there is a way you can make it up to me**

**Marinette: and what is that?**

**Adrien: a real first date? with the real you**

**Marinette: i think that can be arranged. now let’s go find a dark corner to make out in.**

**Adrien: yes ma’am!**

Across the bar Nino watched in relief as his friend snuck off to the dark recesses of the bar with a big dopey smile on his face and a cute mad hatter on his arm.

**Alya: they make a cute couple don’t they?**

**Nino: they had better. i couldn’t take the guilt anymore**

**Alya: i still can’t believe you never told me it was your great great great granny that was the witch that cursed the Agrestes**

**Nino: seeing as how obsessed you were with them at the time i didn’t think it appropriate**

**Alya: you ever gonna tell him?**

**Nino: when the wound is less fresh i think. i mean the boy almost married Chloe because of what my granny did. i don’t think he’d be too keen on me after that**

**Alya: funny how life works out, isn’t it?**

And so they all lived happily ever after. Happily ever after so far at least.

THE END


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